Episode 146: Rebecca Woolf

On being real with your kids, emergence after the death of a spouse and a handful of difficult truths we’re all afraid to face.

REBECCA WOOLF has worked as a freelance writer since age 16 when she became a leading contributor to the hit 90s book series, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul and its subsequent Teen Love Series books. Since then, Woolf has contributed to numerous publications, websites and anthologies, most notably her own award-winning personal blog, Girl’s Gone Child, which attracted millions of unique visitors worldwide. As well as launching her own successful blog, Woolf has contributed dozens of personal essays to publications both on and offline including Refinery29, Huffington Post, Parenting, and Romper and in 2012 hosted Childstyle, a web series on HGTV.com. She has appeared on CNN and NPR and has been featured in The New York Times, Time Magazine and New York Mag. She lives in Los Angeles with her son and three daughters.

In the episode, you’ll hear Rebecca’s powerful, raw story with which you’ll likely be able to relate in some way.

During the episode, you’ll hear passages from Rebecca’s book to introduce you to some of the matters she approaches; her writing is real, potent and truthful, touching the core of our lives and deaths.

In this episode:

  • 2:00 Sometimes death is the beginning of things…
  • 3:45 All of This, a continuation of Rebecca’s story: unfiltered and raw.
  • 5:00 On the inequity of things as Rebecca’s marriage unfolded
  • 7:00 Proficiency in the poetry of acceptance.
  • 9:30 On the compromises and lack of happiness we endure.
  • 11:00 It’s not brave to model the acceptance of toxicity for the children.
  • 12:00 On caring for the dying, losing one’s identity in the face of tending to the dying.
  • 14:45 Marriages are all complicated.
  • 15:15 The poetry of the death of her husband. The love story. The loss.
  • 19:00 Why do we apologize for grief? For our humanity?
  • 22:00 Exploring the corners of grief within us, and how they get triggered.
  • 23:15 Trigger alert: discussion of sexual assault.
  • 23:40 Appeasing men against our own wishes.
  • 24:00 Why we say yes when we mean no.
  • 24:30 Rape culture, patriarchy.
  • 26:00 The power in telling our stories.
  • 27:00 How women suffer so men can be comfortable.
  • 28:30 On the importance of teaching what real pleasure, real sex feels and looks like.
  • 30:00 On self-judgement and judgement of others; on shame and judgement as we heal.
  • 33:00 On the example of Rebecca’s mom’s full acceptance of her.
  • 37:00 On seeing and validating our kids, like Rebecca’s mom did, not helping or fixing but fully accepting.
  • 38:00 What if we were just truthful, expressive and real? What if we just told the truth about EVERYthing?
  • 41:00 Children can handle the WHOLE truth, if you raise them with it.



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